XO, Isabel

Hope and Courage: Our Surrogacy Journey

Archives for February 2016

We’ve got a plan

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IVF plan

Over the last couple of weeks, we’ve continued with our research, conversations and have made many, many decisions. We’re happy to announce that we’ve settled on a surrogacy agency to represent us (more on that once it’s super duper official). And just today, we had a multi-hour meeting with our fertility clinic to go over our upcoming IVF plan. It included a lot of math and dollar signs. Thankfully, we had done plenty of research ahead of time so we avoided showing a face of terror as the the financial consultant’s 10-key calculator kept ringing up numbers higher and higher. We walked away with a good understanding of the entire process, what is expected of us and what our potential timeline looks like. So, as of now, the countdown begins! If all goes smoothly, we should be slotted for an egg retrieval some time in April 2016.

In the meantime, we still have lots of tests to submit ourselves to, finish up our contracts and profile with our agency, and most importantly, research and implement some changes to my daily routine to help optimize our egg retrieval experience, including adding some more maca root powder to my diet, take more vitamins, and throw in some acupuncture for good measure. And somewhere I’ll have to dig up some lucky socks or maybe I just need a new pair, because let’s just face it — any socks I’ve ever worn before just haven’t been that lucky. (;

So, let’s do this!

xo.

We are ready!

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It’s been 904 days. 129 weeks and 1 day. 2 years, 5 months, 21 days. It’s been that long since our Leo died. And during that time, we’ve experienced so many different emotions. Highs and lows, a lot of lows. But the highs were all the more meaningful. Our hearts broke. They broke wide open. They have broken wide open to the possibility of something new. A little spark of hope for a miracle that never did die. For the two of us, it has meant a lot of soul-searching. A lot of late-night pillow talk about our dreams and hopes and the what-in-the-hell-do-we-do-next talks.

Well, we’ve decided. After much thought and consideration (and a lot of hard work), we have opted to pursue IVF in hopes of creating embryos. And then we hope those embryos will be carefully transferred to a woman we have yet to meet. A Gestational Carrier. A dream-come-true. Our hope. Our gift-giver. A surrogate mother for our maybe-baby. Our bun, her oven.

The process is complicated. It’s scary. It’s filled with excitement. It’s filled with terror! Yet, this is what we’re doing. We’re doing it, guys. WE. ARE. DOING. IT! And we’re about to get started very soon! In just a matter of weeks, we’ll begin the IVF process. This will entail lots of testing. Lots of injections and other medications. And lots of visits to our Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE). Blood draws. Lots of ovarian monitoring. A minor surgical procedure for an egg retrieval. Then, we’re going to fertilize those eggs (he has the easy part!) And then we’re going to wait. We’re going to wish and hope that those little things turn into 100-cell embryos. And then we’re going to test those embryos via something called PGD. All in hopes that we can select the most viable little embryo(s) to transfer to a gestational surrogate that will carry the greatest gift we’ve ever known.

Photo by Stephanie Sarles

Photo by Stephanie Sarles

You see, I’ve had a history of recurrent pregnancy loss. I’ve lost five (5) babies already. Most of you reading this know our little lion, Leo. He reminded me just how much I have yearned to be a mama. And he, most of all, made me a mom. And, I’d like to take that one step further, and mother our own little babe here in the flesh. And, because I’ve had so many losses that have never really been explained, we are giving this all that we’ve got. We’re testing my chromosomes – karyotyping – to ensure that my DNA isn’t a tiny bit broken, especially since Leo was diagnosed with XYY Syndrome after his death. We’re going all the way.

We hope that you’ll join us along this journey. Making a baby is supposed to be simple and natural. I realize that this may be far from what you have experienced or know, and we can’t thank you enough for your support. Things haven’t come very easy to us in this department. But, we’re ready. We’re ready for our Rainbow Baby.

xo.